Saturday, June 23, 2012

This Wrinkled Heart of Mine


 This wrinkled heart of mine, I'm gonna let it shine, let it shine, let it shine...

Ahhh, if only that were completely true.  And it is not for lack of trying.  The sharp ache from the implosion of a 3 decade marriage that used to be constant, has given way to more of a continuous dull ache and maybe that will give way one day to the equivalent of an annoying callous and then wonder of wonders before I die, maybe just a clean, clear shiny heart... all better now!

Although, if it doesn't, I have a suspicion that all will still be well.

 We all have our heartaches, coming from all different modes of delivery. So I guess most of us walk around with patched-up hearts. Mine is cracked to be sure, but the crevices are over-flowing with the beauty of my girls, my grandbaby, my old parents and sisters and their kids, and friends and flowers and yes butterflies too, and birds and words, oh the words! that comfort and enlighten, and that includes words from fellow bloggers who affirm and commune and offer poignancy and humor. Thank you...

This wrinkled heart of mine beats another day, and does it still hurt? Hell yea! as my youngest would say. But at least I know that it is still working; that I have a heart that loves and longs and carries on the rhythm of another day. Pretty miraculous right?

So excuse me for now, as I get ready to enjoy a day at the beach with two of my trio of beautiful daughters. The sun awaits, the sky is open and my achy, breaky heart, is joyously, shamelessly full of happy cliches.
* A note about the heart rock. This was given to me from my daughter, who even on her honeymoon in Maui, found a treasure and brought it home to her mom. And it even still smells like the ocean! What a lucky heart I have, I have.. what a beautifully broken heart I have.


2 comments:

  1. I have some hearts like that---Dave and I have a collection of smaller-than-4-inches hearts in all kinds of media. Some are easily identified as hearts, some really stretch, but they're all loved, and my grandchildren move them around, put them in boxes, leave them under pillows and generally help me to see delight in my life. This post sounded hopeful. I'm glad

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  2. I picked up a heart-shaped rock on the beach last week. Every divorcee can use a heart of stone to remind her of the past, right?
    Have a wonderful.

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