With a new job, never ending post- divorce issues, my daughter's wedding on the horizon, a few computer classes throughout the week, daily happenings with my family and babysitting my grandbaby girl, there has not been a minute to spare. I am not used to this, this being busy all the time, this notion of walking around in a body but not reflecting on how this being is doing or what it wants or what it dreams of. This feeling of disconnect...
Feeling especially worn out the other night, I literally dropped into bed and heard a small faraway thought, " I miss me." Really truly. I am not making this up. I was startled by this thought, because it was not generated by any conscious thoughts, preceding it. It just sprang up, right there on its own. An oddity for a number of reasons. One, being that I am pretty much usually in control of my thoughts and can lay claim to at least being involved in the process of their origin and two, I have never thought that much of myself or my own company to have ever felt this way, let alone articulate it from the deep tired recesses of my weary, wrinkled brain.
So either I am loosing it, or making progress. I am guessing it is ok to miss your own good company, isn't it? It's all new to me, either way.
